(AKA. When did I start to dislike school? Or have I always disliked it?)
I know that I love learning. But, when did I start to dislike school? Did I always dislike it? I’ve got to ask my parents. Is this just the end of the semester talking?
When did class become this war between teacher and student? I thought we were on the same side, namely that of learning. So, at the end of a normal day of schooling, why do I feel beaten down and berated? Why do some of my teachers use sarcasm and humiliation as basic tenets of their teaching? The last time I checked, the word “sarcasm” came from Greek meaning “to tear flesh.” When I teach, I try my best to encourage, build up, lead along. Sometimes I don’t always succeed, but I surely don’t try to beat down, tear apart, depress.
Further, where are the checks and balances so that an incompent person does not become responsible for 30 students? And not just any students, but education students. What does a teacher-to-be do when their teacher is incompetent? What power does a student have when a teacher is ineffectual? What if I’ve paid money for this but I am not learning, despite my honest attempts to do so? What does a student do when he encounters blatant hypocrisy? Does the person barking “Do not be late!” arrive late? What if a student is berated when questioning the teacher’s authority in response to this hypocrisy? Even more, what if the teacher not only fails to teach, but in fact leads students down the wrong path, only to test them on things not taught? What if a teacher never grades a single test all semester long? What if you are haven’t received a clear honest evaluation until the last day of class?
I am full of questions, but no answers. This semester has left me stupid-er than I started. If not stupider, then surely more depressed. And is not “emotional intelligence” just as important for success as traditional intelligence?
Oh well, now to my “stable base”: my wife and home. There I find emotional security, even in this turbulent educational environment.